I did it for free for MIT

O.R.

Train Hijinks

I took the train home from the city today. It wasn't a good idea.

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Dave and Osmo are standing on a crowded train station platform during the start of peak hour travel. After a minute a train pulls into the station.

Dave: Damn, the train is crowded.
Osmo Random (OR): Meh. It's not that bad. I've seen worse.
Dave: Okay. Okay. Let's go.

Dave and OR climb aboard the already crowded train carriage.

OR: You're right. It is pretty crowded.

The automatic doors of the train stay open for longer than usual. Suddenly, the train announcer makes an...announcement.

Train announcer (TA): Ladies and Gentlemen, due to a trespasser between South Yarra and Caulfield stations the train on platform 2 will be staying at Parliment station until further notice.
OR: DAMN! DAMN! DAMN! DAMN! DAMN IT TO HELL!
Dave: That'd be right. Well what do we do now?
OR: I say we stick it out. It can't be that long of a delay.
Dave: Okay.

Dave and OR get as comfortable as they can surrounded by a flugen* of commuters. After a few minutes the Train Announcer makes another announcement.

TA: Ladies and Gentlemen, due to a trespasser between South Yarra and Caulfield stations the train on platform 2 will be staying at Parliment station until further notice.
Dave: What the hell does he mean by trespasser anyway?
OR: No idea.

Out of nowhere Rodriguez England appears to help out.

Rodriguez England (RE): Trespasser. Noun. One who enters or remains on the real property of another wrongfully or without the owner's or possessor's authority or consent.
Dave: Hey. Thanks Rodriguez.
RE: No problem. What are you guys doing here anyway.
OR: What does it look like?
RE: Taking the train somwhere?
OR: Correct. Now do you want to go on to the $10,000 question?
RE: I think I'm going to go now.
Dave: That might be a good idea. (Dave speaks to RE away from OR) I think he's a little bit pissed off.
RE: (To Dave) Yeah. I realised. I'll see you later.

RE exits. The beep of the automatic train doors is heard.

OR: HOORAAA!
Dave: Finally!

The highly crowded train slowly makes it's way out of the station. OR sniffs the air.

OR: Oh damn you all to hell! One of you just farted and who ever it was better own up to it.

Scene.
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*flugen - n. a group of humans that travel together.

SDC Archive

The Suicidal Donkey Company has once again forced me (through their own special means) to sign a contract stating that I have to set up an archive of their comics. So I have done so (to avoid the consequences) and it is now accessible here.

To celebrate this joyous event they have also given me a new comic to post. It remains below.



O.R.

Soooooo good! 2: Revenge of the photo booth!

And here lies the final product of the trip inside the wonderful, complementary photobooth. (Top left: the author, top right: Jacob, bottom left: Scarlette, bottom right: Bradley

Photo 1 of 4



Me: "If I close my eyes everything disappears."
Jacob: "My head is lodged between the wall and Dave."
Scarlette: "Wow Dave. That really does work!"
Bradley: "I'm smiling for the photo."


Photo 2 of 4



Me: "EHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Jacob: "You're drooling. How rude!"
Scarlette: "Taste's like cheese."
Bradley: "I'm still smiling for the photo"

Photo 3 of 4



Me: "Can you show it to me?"
Jacob: "My head is really starting to hurt but I must continue to smile"
Scarlette: "Did someone turn the laughing gas on or is that a fart I smell?"
Bradley: "What? Why does it keep flashing? Didn't it already take the photo?"

Photo 4 of 4



Me: "OH! It's huge!!!"
Jacob: "OUCH! My brains! MY BRAINS!"
Scarlette: "It stinks! It stinks!"
Bradley: "Oh. It takes 4 photos..."



And so it ends...

And of course I had to get a fart joke in there. SUCESS!

O.R.

Soooooo good!

One of the best (bestest - if you will) parts of Friday night was impulsively getting crazy photos taken in a photo booth at the Jam Factory. While that was great in itself - what was even better was the side of booth which seemed to try compliment every passer by and intice them into the brightly lit lair of photography.



Now who wouldn't be flattered by a compliment like that. I mean, I was...

All I want to know now is who is being quoted as saying that.

I have my theories:

- Alfred Hitchcock [spoken to Janet Leigh on the set of Psycho.]
- John Landis (Director of the Michael Jackson music video Black or White)[spoken to Michael after he became paranoid that his nose looked to artificial in the video.]

That's really all I've got...

O.R.

Why???

Why did I agree to publish The Suicidal Donkey Company comics on my blog? They're pretty bad and they don't seem to have any character development or much humour. Anyway, I've signed the contract and if I don't post their latest publication they'll cut off my fingers - one at a time - while playing every remix of the crazy frog song ever made. What kind of torture could be worse?

So here it is:



Hopefully they'll go out of business soon so I don't have to put my self through the torment I'm going through right now.

O.R.

Das Machinst - A 1970's Abstract German Film

Or The Machinist - starring Christian Bale.

Well, where to begin? I think I had decided that this would be my type of film before I went in to the cinema and I think I was right.

The film involves a man, an extremely skinny man, who works in a factory, sees the same prostitute frequently, mainly for companionship and has become friends with a waitress at a 24 hour coffee shop during the midnight hours. That's all I'm going to tell you. Oh, and it's subject matter - which may or may not be obvious from the description above - is rather depressing.

I liked it - You might like it. You might not.

Pretty bad review, huh?

Well, Mr. B asked for it - and Mr. B got it...

Maybe next time I won't write a review for a film 3 days after I saw it at 1am in the morning.

D.S.

Great Quotes of the Century - # 5

"Now you're the only one here who can tell me if it's true
that you love me and I love me."
- They Might Be Giants

Source: "Kiss Me, Son of God" by They Might Be Giants

R.E.

The egos behind Osmo's Ramblings

In a comment on a recent post Kate said:

I just noticed that some of the posts on this blog are signed D.S. and some are signed R.E...... does that mean there is more than one osmo? mmmmmmmmmm,
interesting *grin*

In response to this I felt I needed to write a little bit of an explanation of the egos that create Osmo's Ramblings.

Of course it all started with O.R.

R.E. appeared soon after in the post Absolute.

D.S. is a more recent addition to the writing team - appearing initially in Standing at the Opera.

So what do these initials stand for you ask? Who are the authors of this crazy, 'not worth it' blog? Or perhaps you don't ask at all. Perhaps you are the mute type.

Osmo Random is the creator (or god/architect if you like) of Osmo's Ramblings.

Rodriguez England is considered to be Osmo's alter-ego.

From www.wikipedia.com:

An alter ego (from Latin, "other I") is another self, a second personality or persona within a person. The term is commonly used in literature analysis and comparison to describe characters who are psychologically identical.

The term and concept are also frequently used in popular fiction, like comic books,
for the secret identity of a superhero, vigilante or crimefighter.

So who is D.S.? Well...some most readers may know, but for those of you don't - the mystery will remain...

Any questions class?

*school bell rings - class gets up quickly to leave as Mr. Random's class was so boring*

Remember to read pages 41 through 44 over the weekend. There'll be a test on Monday.

O.R.

It's still there.

That's right - If you're wondering where the menu bar is (the one that's usually on the right of the posts) it's found it's way down to the bottom of my blog. Go searching and you'll come up with the goods.

In the meantime - I'll try to fix it...but it's probably not worth it.

Also - a recent addition to the Osmo Random Nepotism list: Thoughts of Some Sort.

O.R.